Inconjunctions in the Birth Chart

                              Taking Back Your Time, Money & Attention

   Solved inconjunctions result in learning to stand up for yourself, recognizing your own wants and needs, and no longer making choices that allow others to use you or extract your wealth, energy, or resources. Most importantly, solved inconjunctions require that we stop placing ourselves in the role of victim in an effort to get our needs met.

Inconjunctions signify deeply ingrained, unexamined beliefs that are often rooted in guilt or shame. These beliefs shape behaviors that produce paradoxical results. There is a fundamental lack of integration between planets that are inconjunct, and this lack of integration is expressed through self-defeating patterns that feel necessary or justified in the moment but ultimately work against us.

Sacrifice and the Misunderstanding of Responsibility

We must understand the true purpose of sacrifice in our lives and how we respond to the internal impulse to give up or take on more than our share. When we do not understand the non-egoic purpose of sacrifice, we make decisions that appear correct in the short term but rob us of satisfaction and fulfillment over time. Often, we do not recognize that we are placing ourselves in the role of victim in an effort to meet the needs signified by the planets involved in the inconjunction. We believe that by sacrificing, working harder, or being more accommodating than necessary, we will eventually be rewarded. We convince ourselves that being nicer, more tolerant, or more responsible than others will produce fairness or reciprocity. Instead, we respond to guilt in ways that are out of proportion to the situation. We give up too much, deny our own needs, and expect this pattern of sacrifice to pay off. When it does not, we feel confused, discouraged and depleted.

Guilt, Shame, and the Loss of Self-Respect

When an inconjunction remains unsolved, we do not engender respect from others because we are not acting in ways that demonstrate self-respect. We carry a persistent sense of guilt, as though there is a debt to be paid, and others often sense this. They may consciously or unconsciously take advantage of it, extracting work, energy, emotional labor, or material resources. This pattern is deeply self-defeating. It produces outcomes we do not deserve and reinforces beliefs about obligation, indebtedness, and unworthiness that were never consciously examined.

Compassion Without Self-Betrayal

It is critical that we wake up to these patterns and examine our beliefs about guilt and shame. Giving too much and expecting a return is an ineffective coping strategy, yet it is one we return to repeatedly when an inconjunction remains unresolved. When inconjunctions are solved, they can become some of the strongest points in the chart. This requires letting go of stories built around the importance of personal sacrifice and developing a more mature understanding of compassion.

Compassion does not always mean rescuing. Compassion can mean allowing others to experience difficulty. It can mean allowing others to grow up, take responsibility, and face the consequences of their own choices. True compassion often requires controlling the impulse to save someone when doing so serves our need to feel needed rather than truly helping them.

Allowing others to sink or swim, allowing others to stop depending on you, and allowing yourself to step out of the savior role are essential steps in releasing the burdens associated with inconjunctions. In doing so, the energy of the inconjunction becomes integrated, and what was once a source of guilt and exhaustion becomes a source of strength, clarity, and self-respect.

Do  you need help solving or understanding a difficult inconjunction or other hard aspect in your natal  chart? Book a consultation with Jewel and get the advice, depth and nuance of information you deserve.

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