With this aspect we are going to see a lot of opposition from others regarding how one goes about eliciting comfort from relationships and emotional connections. An underlying needy-ness is projected before anything is said or done and it tends to turn people the wrong way from what you want. Moving in too quickly or attempting to develop bonds that will tie the other person to you is common behavior. It’s important to slow down and develop casual contact at an appropriate pace so trust can be established.
People can sense the insecurity and need you carry and it’s off putting. This too-much too-soon tendency is what leads to others viewing you as easy or not worth respecting. There can be some hurtful consequences related to how you offer yourself up. There’s a challenge for you to learn to value your own self instead of seeking others to fill that in for you. This lack of restraint in relationships is largely tied to a deep need for security to come to you from the outside. Often people with this aspect feel a drive toward putting themselves in front of the public somehow or seeking adulation or love for something they do or a talent or look that they offer. You are conditioned to seek fulfillment and a sense of stability and worth through superficial means. The challenge is to deepen your connections, deepen your trust and the length of time that you invest in developing a bond that is real. This filters out those superficial relationships that end up taking advantage of you. You also have to get better used to being alone. There is no reason that you have to be alone in the big picture but you do have to get more comfortable with being alone SOMETIMES because it’s not a familiar emotional pattern.
The pattern is to find a pacifier or a blanket and most people target others, food or expensive things or comforts as their pacifier or blanket. But everyone needs to outgrow those coping tools. Everyone needs to learn to give up their teddy bear. That’s the lesson here. Maturing into better emotional patterns so that you can feel secure and supported by your own inner care taker. Looking to elicit responses of care and attachment from others by putting your arms and looking at them with trusting eyes will never work. You must give up your attachment to the need for others to take comforting care of you. You will get what you need, that’s the trick, but you will have to meet your own needs first in order to do that. People do want to love you. You are loveable. But unless you can love yourself first and value yourself first through screening and waiting and discernment, you will not get what you want. If you can love yourself first, you will have everything you need. These feelings of insecurity and lack will turn to surety and true, earned self esteem.
The gluttonous urges that result from this opposition can be greatly reduced and managed when you realize that these are simply fillers and superficial ways of temporarily filling yourself up and feeling good about yourself. Glutting on rich foods, material things, jewelry and fine things is very expensive and it’s often unhealthy to soothe yourself this way. It has consequences. Credit issues, weight issues, financial issues can be a symptom of this problem with indulgence.
The gluttonous urges can be greatly reduced and managed when you realize that these are simply fillers and superficial ways of temporarily filling yourself up and feeling good about yourself. It’s very expensive and often unhealthy to soothe yourself this way. Credit issues, weight issues, financial issues can be a symptom of this problem with indulgence.